Horny Goat Weed

Since I’ve been going to the gym with the kids, I decided to start taking better care of myself including focusing on my nutrition. I read an article that said that even when people live in sunny areas, they can still have a vitamin D deficiency. I live in California, so I never really worried about that. However, I am glow in the dark white, so I wear sunscreen which blocks the much needed vitamin D from getting into my skin. They also suggested that digestive enzymes might help with the breakdown and absorption of minerals. Enzyme and calcium production decrease with age, so off I went to the local drug store.

I got to Rite Aid and headed straight for the vitamin section. I didn’t get a cart because I was only going to grab a few bottles. I was surprised to see the items I wanted were on sale – 2 for 1! That never happens to me (should have been my first clue). I was able to find the calcium and vitamin D, but I couldn’t find the enzymes. I decided to look for them on the bottom shelf where they keep all the weird stuff. Then a bright red bottle caught my eye.

Horny Goat Weed! Nature’s Aphrodisiac! I couldn't stop laughing because nothing says sexy and hot like a horny goat. Of course I got out my camera and took this picture sending it off to Facebook with some smart remark.

After adding in the calcium and the 2 for 1 deals, I wound up having more than I intended to carry. I decided to ask for help to find the enzymes and happened to see a small hand held basket. I happily dumped my armload of supplements inside and was able to find the enzymes.

I headed up to the checkout counter with my haul and set the basket down. The girl pulled out the calcium, then the vitamin D, then the Horny Goat Weed…WHAT??!! Yeah, in all the commotion of trying to find the enzymes, I had dumped the bottle of Horny Goat Weed in my basket instead of putting it back on the shelf.

My eyes bugged out, and I got so freaked out I totally beat boxed the poor girl. “Ba…ah…uh…cha…but….” I finally pulled it together enough to tell her that I had taken a pic for Facebook as a joke.

“So you don’t want it?”

“NOOOOO!”

I haven’t been that red since I got sunburned in Mexico. I couldn’t even look her in the eye. I grabbed my bag and ran out to my car because I’m smooth like that. I almost insisted on showing her the Facebook post. Good thing I didn’t because it never uploaded. Of course.

So now you know. If you need Horny Goat Weed, it’s on the bottom shelf at Rite Aid.