Saturday, December 3, 2011

Please Pass the Ice Cream

            The first year of marriage is a challenge for everyone. My Honey and I were no different. We still giggle when we remember back to that crazy first year. One of favorite stories is the “Ice Cream Incident” that happened a few months after we got married and moved in together.

Honey had been married before and was an old pro in his mind. He had married very young while he worked to put himself through school and start his career. Me? I had a different plan. I was completely independent and didn’t really care about getting married. I also worked to put myself through college and started on the career track. I hadn’t had any significant relationships before we met. I had plenty of friends and hated dating, so why bother? I didn’t have to worry about making anyone happy. I was responsible only to myself, and I liked it that way. It was perfect.

Then I met Honey and my world got turned upside down. We were married in less than a year. He was used to the whole “we” thing which was pretty foreign to me. Oftentimes I would stop by after work and grab a soda or something only to come home to a “Where’s mine?” to which I would reply “You’re a grown man. You can’t buy a soda if you want one?”  I know. I had a lot to learn.

One night, I had a craving for ice cream, so I stopped by the store on the way home. I even remembered to get Honey a little container of his favorite ice cream too. I was pretty proud of myself for being a good wife and thinking of him. I can learn. I got to our apartment and put his ice cream in the freezer. I took mine to the couch not wanting to wait until he got home late.

I was happily munching away when he came home earlier than expected. I was excited, but I had a mouthful of ice cream, so I couldn’t tell him his was in the freezer. He spied me with my mouth full of chocolaty creamy goodness and his eyes squinted. Before I could say a word, he said “Ice cream? You’re eating ice cream? That’s a small container, so I guess you aren’t going to share.”

At this point, I was going to tell him to check the freezer, but I could tell by the look on his face that I was in for a good, long, sarcastic outburst. Since I had a comfy seat and refreshments, I decided to keep my mouth shut and settle in for the show.

“I know you got some for me too. Since you are such a good wife and always thinking of me, I know that if I open the freezer right now there will be some ice cream for me.” (I will interject here to say that he should have known what was coming by the look on my face, but he was too far gone to notice.) “I know there’s some ice cream in here for me because my wife would never buy ice cream without getting some for me too. She would never be that selfish.” He moved dramatically towards the refrigerator. “I know when I open this freezer there will be ice cream for me.”

Unfortunately, he had to turn his back to me to open the freezer because I would have loved to see his face when he saw his favorite ice cream sitting there. He stood staring into the freezer for some time before saying “I’m a big fat jackass.”

“Yep.” I said giggling with glee.

“You could have stopped me at any time you know.”

“What and miss the show? Nah!”